Ask Trish

asktrishscre.jpg Has your norn got a problem? Is he or she love sick, pining for another or simply unable to use a toaster? Trish, our agony aunt, can help you figure out what to do!

Sadly it's come time for Trish to retire. However, here are the letters and answers created during the time it was running. My thanks to everyone who contributed!

Dear Trish
Trish, I need help. I am fifty minutes old and I have discovered eternal youth. I've got the hots for a guy I grew up with, but I can't do anything about it, though, because I stopped aging at the worst time possible! I never grew up, and the hand says I'm still a baby. All my other pals are adults or adolecents, and call me 'shrimp!' How can I change my horrid condition?
From a baby in trouble

Dear a baby in trouble
I suggest that you see a doctor about this, they may help. Either way, you could get leg implants or wear stilts and long pants to hide your abnormal shortness.
From Trish

Dear Trish
Help me,my albia is being over run by grendels,I only have 5 refuge norns living in the gnat dome,and most of them are starving to death.oh what to do,help(I haven't got the grendel/ettin power up yet either)
From General store

Dear General store
This sounds awful! You must immediately start breeding your norns and increase their population, then you can start training them to fend themselves from grendels! Teach them to throw heavy metallic objects at the grendels' heads and put various booby traps around the norn terranium.
From Trish

Dear Trish
George really friendly. Meet George by cliffedge.
From George

Dear George
*grumble* Last time I got a message like it was a male pixie norn with no hair who tried to make me "talk with the fishies". *Just* because I'd accused his girl friend of being less than sympathetic when it came to other species in Albia (she was luring the grendels to the pirranah pool and dropping them in).
So I must pass up your... eloquent... offer
From Trish

Dear Trish
I'm so very sorry I have not written to you in ages.My question is why do you not change your haircut? They really should fire you and find other norn! Your hair is getting *very* old.
Love and kisses from Grandpa
From Alessandro Lou

Dear Alessandro Lou
I am in no hurry to change my hair cut for one simple reason - I am paid very good sponsership money to have it like this! I get a very tidy sum from a hair dresser and I wouldn't want to jeopardise it!
Don't tell Helen though! She doesn't get anything HAHAHA!
From Trish

Dear Trish
My mummy ran away! One minute, she was with the males, eating, and then she was floating up into the sky! I was just talking to my friends and she was just lying there, floating away. I want mummy to come back! What should I do?
Mummy!
From Want my mum

Dear Want my mum
Oh dear. It is a sad fact to accept, but your mummy has passed on. I'm sorry, but at least now you won't have to do your homework and you can have pizza in bed without getting in trouble.
From Trish